Wednesdays are Love Letters to my husband days…
To my darling husband,
I love you so much. I am sorry for being tired and cranky lately – I’m not entirely sure why. I guess I can be so highly strung and my need for control so great that I find it hard to just let go. But, letting go is just what I want to do. Babe, I am so tired of living in fear of living in fear. Constantly my mind keeps going to “what if”… so many what if’s, but this is what I am focosing on: the fact that I have God who I completely believe in and trust, who I know is on my side, who loves me with an everlasting love and I want to surrender all my fears, anxieties, distressing thoughts to Him. Sometimes… I just don’t know how to.
The truth is that I can step out into the sun, I can feel the gentle breeze on my face. I can break down the walls I’ve been hiding behind my entire life. In Jesus, I am safe, loved and accepted. I can embrace my husband and my life as blessings from God. I can embrace God who loves me completely. I can trust in who God created me to be. I can trust God will always guide me saying, “Here is the path.” I can trust God has created me fearfully and wonderfully. I will NOT give up. I will reap the harvest of blessing if I do NOT give up.
One of the ways I think to do that is by expressing gratitude. So, today, I want to thank you for being who you are; for being the husband and father that you; for loving me so much; for loving our daughter and for being an amazing provider to me and our family. I am grateful that as hard as it has been that we have walked this path of parenting together, because I could not imagine our lives without our little Baby Girl. And I am grateful that we both have good jobs, bringing in much needed income to provide for our lifestyles. I am grateful, my love, that I am a Christian – I shudder to think where I would be right now if I wasn’t a Christian.
But, there is prayer that I have prayed for a very long time – and it is a prayer that was summed up so nicely in yesterday’s email of The Word for Today that I pray I can be for:
But if you let Him, God will give you the oil of compassion and the wine of love to pour into your spouse’s wounds.
I pray that your wounds in life, from your family, from your childhood will be healed by the oil of compassion and the wine of love in my heart. I pray daily that you will see just a glimpse of God’s love for you in my love for you – that you will realise and know that you are worthy of respect and love; you are honoured and you are valuable. I don’t know if I can do that – I am weak and frail and human. But, through Christ I can – and I hope that you will see it.
I love you!
The Baby Mama