I think that sometimes we forget – at least I know I do – that our marriages, and our spouses, are gifts to us. Gifts that are worth fighting for.
God, not only in grace but also in wisdom, has gifted us with our spouse. When we are challenged by the stresses of life, our spouse might not always seem like God’s good, wise and gracious gift to us. But to keep in focus the vision of our marriage as a gift of friendship and companionship from God, we need to value and treat our spouse as our most important relationship. How different would our marriages be if we consistently saw our spouse as a gift from God to us? How might our relationship be different if we saw them as a friend instead of a foe when we have to reconcile our differences? How might our marriage be better if we saw them as one who complements us instead of competes with us when we face difficult challenges? Reference here.
Life is hard. Marriage can be very hard. Merging to different souls, personalities, backgrounds and family can be challenging. Selfishness, pride, greed – all hinder intimacy. But, these are all aspects of life that we need to face and deal with if we’re going to move forward and into greater intimacy with our spouses.
However, while we’re facing life head-on, we can either do it seeing our spouse as the enemy – and I can guarantee you that mindset won’t make the journey any easier or more rewarding.
We can view our spouses as a gift. Something to be treasured and looked after and nurtured and loved. And you treasure and love and nurture something – not because you have a good marriage – but because the object in question is valuable, a gift…
You can be in a really tough place right now with circumstances way beyond your control, and I know how hard that can be, but you could also be in a place of creating your own reality by the negative thoughts you have about your marriage and your spouse. Realise that your spouse is a gift and start treating your spouse as such…
… then move forward to a deeper and more pleasurable intimacy.
Because even more than your spouse being a gift to you, is the fact that the intimacy you share is an even greater gift. It is that place where you are safe, where you can truly be yourself, where you can express your desires and fears with equal acceptance, where you know you are truly loved.
What an amazing gift God has bestowed upon us.
MY WORD FOR THE YEAR – 2016 / Intimacy – Time / Intimacy – Climbing a Wall / Intimacy – that one move! / Intimacy – Talking / Intimacy – Saying Sorry! / Intimacy – that one word / Intimacy – touch / Intimacy – those awkward moments / Intimacy – a sacrament… / Intimacy – Resting / Intimacy – Seven Red Flags / Intimacy – being separate / Intimacy – Never Giving Up / Intimacy – Honour / Intimacy – God / Intimacy – A new day… / Intimacy – Being True / Intimacy – Changing You / Intimacy – The Good, The Bad and The Ugly / Intimacy – Letting go of Fear / Intimacy – Rest / Intimacy – Knowing