Today is day 7 of Jennifer Smith’s 30 day devotional, Wife After God.
In Sheila Wray Gregoire’s blog, she has a post that I wish everyone could read. It’s called, What the Vow Means. And in it she talks about how it doesn’t matter what your husband has done or hasn’t done, or what kind of marriage you do or don’t have, the vows matter because you are called to obedience to God. And God asks you to honour your marriage.
And that is where holiness starts. It starts with honouring God first, because God has called you to honour your husband and your marriage. And in surrendering to God, your transformation to holiness begins.
Your marriage may never be the thing that you dreamed it would be. Perhaps you need to let go of that dream and say, “marriage was not supposed to meet all of my needs.” Maybe you need to say, “I am staying because I vowed, and I will love him, but I will need God to get me through, day by day.” And that honestly is okay. I believe that even the worst relationships can be redeemed; I’ve seen it. I believe that marital messes can become marital successes. But it often comes first by one party utterly surrendering to God and saying, “You will be enough for me.” Reference here.
And God can use marriage in any number of ways to make you holy – a good marriage to bring you closer to Him, a bad marriage to bring you closer to Him. But, holiness also means to be set apart. We are sanctified by Christ and set apart from this world. We belong to him. Likewise, in marriage, we are set apart – we belong to our husbands.
[She said distinctly] My beloved is mine and I am his! He pastures his flocks among the lilies. Reference here.
In Ephesians 5:21-33 Paul mentions the profound correlation between Christ’s relationship with the Church and the relationship between a husband and wife. The two love stories mirror each other in great ways—one of which is sanctification. It is an event AND a process of transformation. Reference here.
God will use our marriages and our husbands to grow us – just taking the step from being single, to now having to consider someone else’s perspective and desires and wants, is step away from being selfish and towards being more loving. And God will continue to do that – for both you and your husband – until eternity.
…being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
Thank you for my husband. Thank you that he loves me and that I love him. Thank you God that even in tough seasons in marriage, or trying and difficult marriages, we can still – through your grace and strength – honour you and our husbands. Thank you, Lord, that you can use whatever situation we are in to grow us to holiness, peace and love: for ourselves, for our husbands, but most importantly, for you. I pray that you will continue to work in my marriage, and bring my husband and I closer together. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.