In my last post, Crossing the Great Divide, I posted about how God led me to blogs about marriage, when I was looking for blogs on anxiety. And in all of those blogs, I have realized it is how you think about something – or what you think about a thing that truly counts. You may not even know what you think about something, but that deep underlying thought will creep through when you go through trial and testing in life. And when it comes to the surface, that is when you can deal with it and you can ask God to renew your heart and mind and to change how you see things and view life to be in line with the Bible. And that is why God allows trial in our lives – to test us, to clean us, to refine us. It is never easy. But it is necessary if we would become more like Christ.
It has been an amazing journey – but it is a journey that I started even before Baby Girl’s arrival as my hubby used to point out to me how negative my thinking was, how aggressive I can sometimes be…
And still I am walking this journey as each and every day God is refining me.
Last week, Sheila Wray Gregoire on her blog, To Love, Honour and Vacuum, posted “Does God Make a Difference“. And looking back over the course of my journey, I can say emphatically that yes, He does. I know that my biggest anxiety problem is not living by faith, and living in fear that it will all crumble around me. The more I am able to live by faith, the less anxious I feel. However, the less I live in faith and just simply trusting – the more anxious I feel.
2 Corinthians 10:5
We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. Reference here.
You see – I’m not sure what comes first, the chicken or the egg. Negative thinking or anxiety – but I do know that anxiety is filled with negative thoughts. And God has taught me over the last while to take those thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ. I cannot dwell on all this negativity, and expect to live a victorious life. And so that is what I am focusing on.
And then I look at my marriage – it scares me to say that many couples who have been through less than what we have, have walked away from their marriages. It scares me because that is the reality of the world we live in. But, hubby and I have always said that quite simply that isn’t an option for us – for us, our only options are either to live happily married or to live unhappily married. And God has changed my views and thinking to let me know that no matter how difficult things may be, no matter how little sleep I have had, no matter how many mind games my mother has played with me, or how tight our finances are – the option to be truly, insanely happy in your marriage is always there. No matter what is going on around you.
And then I read about the silly, little things you can do in your marriage to make things better – and I have to laugh. Because as silly as what those little things are, the effects are like a ripple that can keep growing in waves throughout your marriage.
Like welcoming your spouse home after work.
Pouring them a glass of wine with dinner.
Giving them a back rub.
Realising this person is your best friend, and treating them as such.
Talking – just talking – about things, every day events, anything.
Will there ever be a day that I don’t need to work on this? I don’t think so. I think each and every one of us as the propensity to weakness – and that weakness will be different for each of us. Mine is to be negative and to believe the worst, and then to allow anxiety to follow. And so, probably for the rest of my life, I need to be aware of this, and continually focus on having faith and trusting that all will work out for our good.
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Reference here.
And so in answer to Sheila’s question – does God make a difference. Yes, He does. He most definitely does. And He is involved in the detail of our lives. We may not see it, or acknowledge it, but He is. And He loves us.
And whatever path we are on in our lives, I think that God will take us on the path that when we look back over our lives, we can see His workings in our world – yes, just like the footprints in the sand.