I have no idea if you know about the troubles in South Africa with the #feesmustfall campaign. Now, I have no issue with protests – if something is wrong, and the government isn’t taking a stand to correct the issue, then we need to make the government listen. It’s not the protests in and of itself […]
I remember when my daughter started to walk. She was just over a year, and she so desperately wanted to walk. She would take a step, fall, take another step, fall… Thankfully she usually just fell on her padded bottom so she didn’t get hurt. Learning to walk took practice – lots of it. I admired her tenacity – when she fell, she got up. She carried on practicing walking. It was so funny that when she mastered walking enough to go on her own, she would walk round and round our dining room table; over and over and over again… just because she could.
Intimacy at the start of a relationship is relatively easy. Sure, your personal circumstances may be different, but for the most part most of us are on emotional highs, we have hormones raging through our systems that are pulling us closer together and the thought of sitting up all night talking is exactly what we both want to do.
Fast forward a couple of years, and now instead of talking all night, we barely acknowledge each other before crashing to sleep and moaning when we wake. Okay, I moan because I hate getting up early, hubby enjoys getting up early so he can cycle.
Being as it may, something happened to that intimacy that we used to share so intensely in the early stages of our relationship. Whether it is because we’ve grown so accustomed to each other that we don’t feel the need to share so personally, or we don’t have the time, or we’re just too rushed off our feet looking after the kids, keeping a home and trying to work… Things get pushed aside, priorities change, life happens.
Let’s be honest – for the most part, we know what we need to do to build a strong marriage:
Communicate more, be more loving and forgiving, have more sex, have more fun, talk about the big issues in life more, talk more about the little issues, etc, etc, etc…
I recently finished a little gem of a book called Calm my Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow and in there I discovered a little nugget of wisdom that I have not come across before. In fact, I didn’t really come across it when I read the book – it was only afterwards as I was pondering all the truth and wisdom contained in the book that this truth was brought to light.
Who likes to practice? I don’t… If I can’t master something straight on then I’m usually not interested. But, God has been working with me on this area in so many different ways.
Firstly, getting fit: When I first started running, I couldn’t. A friend said let’s go walk around the park, which is about 2km and I couldn’t do it. It was so embarrassing that a simple walk around the park landed up with me almost fainting because I was so unfit and so out of shape. I decided I needed to do something about this and so I started walking more and more. When I felt walking fit, I slowly started running for 30 seconds and walking for four and a half minutes. When that felt comfortable, I then started slowly running for a minute, and walking for four; then running for a minute and a half, and walking for three and a half minutes; then up another 30 seconds and walking for three minutes. I did this over a number of months until I was slowly running all the way around the park. In fact, it took me almost a year to get to the point of being able to run the whole way around the park.
A whole year…
And that was with practising almost every day.
And even now, though, I still sometimes have to walk, and I have since run a few 10 km races (and surprisingly enough thoroughly enjoyed it). My point is that I have to continue practising – and training.
Secondly, my anxiety – I have been feeling so frustrated because I still have these anxious laden thoughts bombarding my brain at the most inconvenient times. I was praying about this the other day and asking God what more I need to do to move beyond anxiety once and for all and very clearly and very distinctly the world “practice” came to mind. You see, even though I know what to do now with regards to anxiety (cast my cares onto God, trust in the Blessed Controller, live in the now, etc) I’m not really putting any of this into practice. I know cognitively what I need to do and where I want to be in life, but I need to put into practice. I get frustrated when I still feel anxious, but I haven’t really put what I have learnt into practice.
Thirdly, intimacy – my husband and I fell off the bandwagon big time after Baby Girl’s arrival. She quite literally rocked our world and we battled. I know what to do to regain intimacy with my husband – I just don’t always do it. Why don’t I always do it? Because it’s not second nature to me. I haven’t truly practiced intimacy with my husband (and God) in a way that is producing fruit.
How can I expect to move beyond anxiety if I don’t put into practice what I have learnt EVERY DAY. I mean, actually act out what I know to be true? Emotions and thoughts are far more fickle than learning to run, so if it’s taken me a year to get to the point of running 2km’s, then how much longer will it take to practice healthy and productive thoughts and emotions?
Philippians 4:8 NIV: Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
That fact that Paul exhorts us to think about what is excellent or praiseworthy means we have a choice. If we have a choice it means that it is something we can practice doing – as he tells us to do what he has done:
Philippians 4:9 NIV: Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. (Emphasis mine)
Now, back to intimacy: whilst we mostly know what do to do to create an intimate relationship with our partners, how often do we actually practice those things? By going round and round the coffee table, over and over and over again, until it becomes second nature?
And even when it becomes second nature, you then continue to practice – and train your mind, body and emotions – you don’t stop. If I stopped running now, I would lose all the hard work I have put in and the abilities I have now to run 10km. then, in just a few months’ time, I will need to start all over again. The fitness I have now gained will be lost.
So it is with the battle with anxiety.
And so it is with intimacy – I practice until it becomes second nature, and then I continue practising. I don’t ever stop – because it is then that I become unfit and sluggish and needing to start all over.
Galatians 6:9 NIV: Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
Tenacity – never giving up. Keep on keeping on; day by day; one step at a time.
Practice. Practice. Practice.
Every day, in every way, practice.
23 I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings.
The Need for Self-Discipline
24 Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. 25 Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.
MY WORD FOR THE YEAR – 2016 / Intimacy – Time / Intimacy – Climbing a Wall / Intimacy – that one move! / Intimacy – Talking / Intimacy – Saying Sorry! / Intimacy – that one word / Intimacy – touch / Intimacy – those awkward moments / Intimacy – a sacrament… / Intimacy – Resting / Intimacy – Seven Red Flags / Intimacy – being separate / Intimacy – Never Giving Up / Intimacy – Honour / Intimacy – God / Intimacy – A new day… / Intimacy – Being True / Intimacy – Changing You / Intimacy – The Good, The Bad and The Ugly / Intimacy – Letting go of Fear / Intimacy – Rest / Intimacy – Knowing / Intimacy – A Gift / Intimacy – healing / Intimacy – Cleaving / Intimacy – Love Casts out Fear / Intimacy – Feelings / Intimacy – Attitude / Intimacy – Acceptance / Intimacy – Boxes / Intimacy – His Precious Marbles / Intimacy – Humility
The Baby Mama
Last night, I had a bit of a – what shall I call it – tiff with my mother-in-law. It was something small, that escalated, and she came to me to apologise. But, it has bugged me – you see, ever since the huge fight with hubby’s sister, the relationship between his mom and I has strained.
And while I am so grateful that they are here to help with Baby Girl these holidays, there is definitely tension in the house.
I think I am angry over the lack of support we received; how Baby Girl never features unless the sister gives permission; and how we’re not allowed to know anything of what is happening in the family because everything is a KGB secret. And I think I’ve gotten to the point of just giving up. Quite simply, enough is enough. If my daughter isn’t deemed worthy enough to be included in the family as an equal, well then, I have simply abdicated myself from the family dynamic. Many spouses do this in marriage when they get to the point of enough is enough.
But, you see, that doesn’t make for a very good family dynamic or a strong marriage. In fact, it just makes things worse. And I think that is the strain felt over the last couple of days since arriving in P.E.
Anyway – after our little tiff last night, and waking up this morning with my jaws sore from clenching my teeth during the night, I’ve realised that not only have they done wrong, but my attitude is completely wrong. I had this nagging thought on humility and how I have become so big for my boots that the universe very nearly actually does revolve around me.
I never used to be like this.
What makes what I say and do so right?
So I came across 1 Peter 5:5-8:
In the same way, you who are younger, submit yourselves to your elders. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.
It is interesting to note the “submit to your elders”. My husband’s parents may not see that the damage their favouritism of his sister has done, but they are good people and are filled with love. And they are here to help us during these school holidays.
And now intimacy – do cast ALL your anxiety (burdens, problems, cares) onto God, means that I am not in control of those cares and anxieties. I have no say; they have been given to God Almighty and He will lift me up at the right time… But, they are not mine anymore. For a person who craves control, who craves to understand my place in the world, who craves some sort of say over how things happen and what happens, this is very humbling. It says,
“Lord, I am not interfering. I cast all my anxieties onto you – for you to deal with, and I trust in you and wait on you to lift me up at your appointed time.”
It is a complete and total surrender to God for HIM to resolve whatever issue you have. And to do that, you need to really know who your God is. From that flows an intimacy that allows you to believe and trust that God has this; He is the Blessed Controller of all things…
So, whatever anger has plagued me from the past, whatever issues I feel completely out of control, whatever ails me, I am going to practice surrendering myself to Him, and walking in humility as He takes control.
The Baby Mama
MY WORD FOR THE YEAR – 2016 / Intimacy – Time / Intimacy – Climbing a Wall / Intimacy – that one move! / Intimacy – Talking / Intimacy – Saying Sorry! / Intimacy – that one word / Intimacy – touch / Intimacy – those awkward moments / Intimacy – a sacrament… / Intimacy – Resting / Intimacy – Seven Red Flags / Intimacy – being separate / Intimacy – Never Giving Up / Intimacy – Honour / Intimacy – God / Intimacy – A new day… / Intimacy – Being True / Intimacy – Changing You / Intimacy – The Good, The Bad and The Ugly / Intimacy – Letting go of Fear / Intimacy – Rest / Intimacy – Knowing / Intimacy – A Gift / Intimacy – healing / Intimacy – Cleaving / Intimacy – Love Casts out Fear / Intimacy – Feelings / Intimacy – Attitude / Intimacy – Acceptance / Intimacy – Boxes / Intimacy – His Precious Marbles
- That God would protect and nurture my marriage;
- That God would aid our financial situation and provide for us according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus;
- That God would be with and guide our little girl that she will know that even though she is an only child, God is always with her and He will always love her and be with her;
- That God will help me to eat healthily, lose weight and exercise.
I know that my fears and anxieties pertaining to my marriage are solely from my own background and my parent’s divorcing when I came back from honeymoon, smiling. I know that in my marriage I firstly need to honour God, but secondly that I can only ever control myself. I can work on me, and hope and pray that my husband works on what he needs to – but I can’t force it. My control in my marriage resides only in controlling me and what I am learning and doing and focusing on.
For our financial situation, both my husband and I lost our jobs in a very short space of time (within a few years of each other) and we have never recovered financially. Short of buying lotto tickets every week, there is very little I can do about our financial situation… except to trust God. His word says He will provide everything we need according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus. So, in God will I trust.
For Baby Girl, her life path is already written by the creator of the Heavens and the Earth. I can’t shield her or protect her from life any more I can myself. Life happens, and all I can really do is try preparing her the best way I know how, and quite simply just love her; become her safe place when life becomes overwhelming and frightening.
And finally – my weight and getting fit. Now this IS something I can do something about – there are a whole lot of heart issues I need to get to grips with, but essentially my control over what I eat, how much I eat, and how much I exercise is far more in my control than any of the other prayers. I am walking this path until I finally get there.
But our brain is plastic. We can create new pathways + habits + patterns. We can rewire our brain. We can create a NEW default mode. A mode that leads to more cheers + smiles + feelings of accomplishment. Every action we take either moves us closer to — or farther away from our goals and a more fulfilling life. What if we chose to stop giving the missteps and so-called “screw ups” so much of our attention? What if we chose to consciously shine a light on the successes? How might our lives transform? I’m in the midst of a personal experiment. Earlier this week, I started keeping what I call a Towards Journal. It’s simply a list of every action I’ve taken that propels me towards what I want for myself in life. In other words — the actions I take each day that are in line with my top values (connection, adventure, fitness, skilfulness, kindness). The actions that make me feel proud + accomplished + fulfilled. Now I’m only on day 4, BUT — I think I’m on to something you guys. When we’re focusing on what we’ve done well, we go out of our way to create even more actions to add to the list. Chickadee Weight Loss
And this is the motivation for my new blog – a focus on one foot forward towards my goals and desires; those things that are within my control – all the myriad of successes I have each day that I don’t even think about, a moving towards my goals – instead of focusing on all the negative, a moving away from…
I have just finished reading the most lovely book called The Marble Collector by Cecelia Ahern. It is such a lovely story and such a lovely read. Basically, in a nut shell:
When Sabrina Boggs stumbles upon a mysterious collection of her father’s possessions, she discovers a truth where she never knew there was a lie. The familiar man she grew up with is suddenly a stranger to her. An unexpected break in her monotonous daily routine leaves her just one day to unlock the secrets of the man she thought she knew. A day that unearths memories, stories and people she never knew existed. A day that changes her and those around her forever. Goodreads
There is a part of the story, without giving too much away, that really speaks of what intimacy is about: Sabrina’s dad collects marbles. It is the most precious thing in his life – so precious in fact that he hides it from everyone. He is ashamed that a grown man can be so drawn to marbles that he can’t tell anyone about his prized possession. While on his honeymoon, he goes to a glass shop and sees a prized marble and spends his meagre earnings on this one beautiful marble for his new bride. He goes back to the hotel suite to give this precious gift to his bride and what does she do? She lambasts him for wasting money they don’t have on something so stupid and insignificant and totally rejects his gift.
Except it wasn’t just a marble to him.
This man – this character in this book – was giving his bride something that was more precious to him than even his life.
And she rejected it.
Years later, he meets someone who he can share his passion with (clearly his wife and him are divorced at this point), but the damage was done.
That story, that part of the book, has become my prayer.
Lord, please let me be worthy of looking after and accepting whatever marbles my husband brings to me; his heart, his interests, his soul. Let me treasure what he treasures and look after what he looks after. May I be worthy of what he reveals to me, and protect what he finds so precious in his life. May he feel safe to share his life with me. Help me to protect and heal his whatever wounds life has bestowed on him.
And this is what I have realized true intimacy is: when we get to that point that we can truly share who we are – to the very core of our being, and those things that we find so precious and so dear in this life, knowing that it will be safe with the person we are sharing it with; it will be understood and accepted – then we are experiencing true intimacy. And they, in turn, can share with us their precious things knowing it will be safe.
Look after your spouses marbles – know that for them it is a rare treasure. And if you don’t know what their marbles are, now is the time to find out and prove yourself worthy of the prized treasure.
MY WORD FOR THE YEAR – 2016 / Intimacy – Time / Intimacy – Climbing a Wall / Intimacy – that one move! / Intimacy – Talking / Intimacy – Saying Sorry! / Intimacy – that one word / Intimacy – touch / Intimacy – those awkward moments / Intimacy – a sacrament… / Intimacy – Resting / Intimacy – Seven Red Flags / Intimacy – being separate / Intimacy – Never Giving Up / Intimacy – Honour / Intimacy – God / Intimacy – A new day… / Intimacy – Being True / Intimacy – Changing You / Intimacy – The Good, The Bad and The Ugly / Intimacy – Letting go of Fear / Intimacy – Rest / Intimacy – Knowing / Intimacy – A Gift / Intimacy – healing / Intimacy – Cleaving / Intimacy – Love Casts out Fear / Intimacy – Feelings / Intimacy – Attitude / Intimacy – Acceptance / Intimacy – Boxes
I like counting in fours.
I have always have.
Every time I walk somewhere, I count my steps on fours. Seriaaasssly.
Maybe I shouldn’t be admitting this on a public blog – my little “blog box”. Uh, just how many followers do I have? LOL – but I like fours. I like the number four, I like counting in fours, and I like arranging my life in fours. As in four sides – you know, a little box. I have a little box for everything. My marriage and family boxes (two very distinct and separate boxes in my mind) are my two most important boxes. If those two boxes are functioning well and are happy, then all of my other little boxes are happy. Those two boxes have become the foundation of how I judge my life.
Marriage box – all good and happy? Check.
Family box – all good and happy? Check.
But, God has been talking to me about my boxes. This is another aspect or thought pattern I kinda knew I had, but not really because you see, I don’t allow any one box to intersect or connect with any other box in my life.
My work box is filled with issue to do with work, but I don’t really include my husband or daughter in my work box. I chat a very minimal amount of shop when I get home, and very rarely do I share about my home box at work. I keep the two separate.
And my family box doesn’t really have a bearing on my marriage box.
My extended family box doesn’t even feature in my marriage or family box at all.
Doesn’t all this sound just a little too weird?
As I was praying about these new revelations this morning, God spoke to me through two very distinct passages. In other words, I cannot doubt what God is telling me.
The most important was from Proverbs31.org about when you need a script to get somewhere in life.
After all, a script breeds confidence. When we follow a script, we know exactly what to say and do. We can play our part with poise and avoid the possibility of failure. A script reduces risk. When we can anticipate what’s coming next, we don’t have to worry about being caught off-guard or feeling unprepared. A script creates comfort. Once we master our lines, we don’t need to navigate unexpected plot twists or sudden scene changes. Reference here.
And you see – that is exactly what I do with boxes. If everything is all neat and tidy in their little boxes, then if one box falls apart – all the others remain unaffected. I know cognitively that it doesn’t work that way, but I really like to set my life up like that. In fact, I could rewrite this quote from Proverbs31.org like this:
After all, a box breeds confidence. It is sturdy, and strong, and keeps everything from getting messy. When we compartmentalise our lives into boxes, we know where everything is kept. It keeps everything organised. It helps us deal with life in a neat and orderly manner. We can handle whatever comes our way in a neat and orderly fashion provided we’re dealing with the right box. Life is never messy. It is always organised. And we don’t have to worry about the box with the messy business of life – because that box is piled right on top and can be dealt with whenever I am ready to deal with it.
Doesn’t that sound a little too convenient?
The second place that God spoke to me is through a delightful book from Linda Dillow called Calm my Anxious Heart, and in it Linda speaks about allowing God to paint His brushstrokes across the canvas of our lives. It is messy, it can be hard, but when we trust God and allow Him to work a masterpiece across our lives, there is no room for boxes. Here is what I am realising – God doesn’t work in boxes. If you stack a pile of boxes covering various aspects of your life, what are you left with? You’re left with a pile of boxes. However, when you allow God to create a masterpiece, there is no room for boxes, but plenty of room for the creation of a masterpiece. He works in you, in your heart and in your life to create a magnificent masterpiece –
If only we will trust Him enough to let Him.
I cannot keep my marriage box separate from my work box – what happens in my marriage and who I am will affect my performance at work. What happens at work, if I have a really bad day, will impact my marriage. And so it is with all the other boxes in my life.
I think what God is doing is helping me to unpack all these boxes and helping me to start viewing my life as an integrated, blessed and beautiful existence.
I am very much aware that often we will not see all the blessings we desire in this life, God works on the heart and the attitude of the heart that we truly reflect Jesus to the world. Without a box in sight…
MY WORD FOR THE YEAR – 2016 / Intimacy – Time / Intimacy – Climbing a Wall / Intimacy – that one move! / Intimacy – Talking / Intimacy – Saying Sorry! / Intimacy – that one word / Intimacy – touch / Intimacy – those awkward moments / Intimacy – a sacrament… / Intimacy – Resting / Intimacy – Seven Red Flags / Intimacy – being separate / Intimacy – Never Giving Up / Intimacy – Honour / Intimacy – God / Intimacy – A new day… / Intimacy – Being True / Intimacy – Changing You / Intimacy – The Good, The Bad and The Ugly / Intimacy – Letting go of Fear / Intimacy – Rest / Intimacy – Knowing / Intimacy – A Gift / Intimacy – healing / Intimacy – Cleaving / Intimacy – Love Casts out Fear / Intimacy – Feelings / Intimacy – Attitude / Intimacy – Acceptance
One of the biggest challenges to true intimacy – as I have discovered this last week – is a lack of acceptance.
- Not accepting your spouse for who they are
- Not accepting your circumstance, your “lot” in life, so to speak
- Not accepting who you are
Psalm 16:5-7 NIV LORD, you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance. I will praise the LORD, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me.
As I revealed last week in doing Dr Caroline Leaf’s 21 Day Detox program, I have some seriously negative attitudes to marriage that I did not know that I had. It is all based in my childhood when my own parents’ marriage and some of the decisions they made in that marriage had a truly profound effect on me. It is this negative attitude that God is now dealing with. I was protecting myself from hurt by not accepting that this is exactly where God wanted me – you know, “just in case” something had to happen I’m prepared for it. God knew before I was even born who I would marry and who I would be with, what child we would have for He created her and knit her together in my womb. God knew – before I knew. He knew – and He rejoiced.
I am reading a lovely book called Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow and in it she explains the importance of trusting that God knows exactly where you are in life and where you need to be to grow like Christ. We can surrender ourselves to Him and trust that it is all good. Linda Dillow quotes from J.I. Packer and I love this quote,
Contentment is essentially a matter of accepting from God’s hand what He sends because we know that He is good and therefor it is good.
I don’t think we give God enough credit for being in control and knowing exactly what he is doing.
He is God.
He created the world – the entire universe – in six days.
Do we not for one minute think that He’s got this?
Whatever your situation is – God has it. He has it in the palm of His hand. He knows you and He loves you. He wants what is best for you. Your growth to becoming like Christ is of the utmost importance to Him because in that growth is where we can experience God’s true peace. Please note, as Linda Dillow so eloquently states, our peace and surrender to God is NOT determined by our circumstances. In fact, our life could quite literally be falling down around us and we can still experience God’s peace, because God is in control. It’s that surrendering to God that gives us peace because we know that He is good and we can trust Him to work it all out for our good.
Romans 8:28 King James Version (KJV), “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”
How does this pertain to marriage and to intimacy?
Well, you can surrender your fears and anxieties, your doubts and insecurities to Him and know that He has got this. You can trust Him. You are free to enjoy your marriage, and any form of intimacy with your husband as long as it honours God, because well – this is your portion and your cup from God.
Psalm 16:5-7 NIV LORD, you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance. I will praise the LORD, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me.
So, for me, who is dealing with the negative repercussions from my parents’ marriage, I can surrender my fear and anxiety to God knowing that God had control, does have control and is in control. I can give God my heart knowing that He will handle it with the utmost care as He grows me to be more like Christ.
Now, for any marriage that is generally struggling with intimacy and general everyday life issues, all this is fine. But what about marriages where there are issues like infidelity, porn, drugs, etc. I can’t tell you what to do – I do agree with Sheila Wray Gregoire where she says you cannot enable sin. For some of you, that may mean leaving. For others, it may mean confronting – in love –your spouse.
Even in this, you can trust God that He has got this. He is with you, every moment of every day and while you need to earnestly seek God and seek His word on what you need to do in that specific situation, remember that He loves you deeply, intently and sacrificially.
If your spouse is acting in such a way that they are denying a vital part of themselves and a vital part of the Christian life–like responsibility or intimacy or community–then doing nothing about it enables that spouse to avoid any impetus for spiritual growth. Sheila Wray Gregoire
Go to your church and find someone who will help you; who will sit down and talk to your husband, whether he likes it or not, to hear his side of the story. Someone who will walk you through an intervention process, if it is necessary (and in some cases it definitely is). And someone who will stand alongside your husband and give him the tools and help he needs to rediscover who he was made to be.
I know this is scary. When you rock the boat, you feel like, “if this marriage breaks up I’ve failed.” But you have not. And while divorce damages kids greatly, there are times when staying in a marriage does, too. Those times are rare, and please, don’t take these words as an excuse to leave your husband because he plays video games too much or won’t put stuff in the dishwasher. I’m not talking about normal marital disagreements. I’m talking about things where men (or women) have completely forsaken key elements of who they were designed to be. And in that case, your children need to witness health and wholeness and healing. So don’t stop until you find someone to help you! Sheila Wray Gregoire
Love this: …where men (or women) have COMPLETELY forsaken key elements of who they were designed to be.
And here’s the crux – even if you have to confront major sin in your spouse, or just learn to accept that you are exactly where God wants you to be: He has got this.
God has got this.
We cannot put God into a box – He is bigger and more magnificent and more loving than we can ever hope to give Him credit for.
Surrender your life to Him and watch Him work. God has got this.
MY WORD FOR THE YEAR – 2016 / Intimacy – Time / Intimacy – Climbing a Wall / Intimacy – that one move! / Intimacy – Talking / Intimacy – Saying Sorry! / Intimacy – that one word / Intimacy – touch / Intimacy – those awkward moments / Intimacy – a sacrament… / Intimacy – Resting / Intimacy – Seven Red Flags / Intimacy – being separate / Intimacy – Never Giving Up / Intimacy – Honour / Intimacy – God / Intimacy – A new day… / Intimacy – Being True / Intimacy – Changing You / Intimacy – The Good, The Bad and The Ugly / Intimacy – Letting go of Fear / Intimacy – Rest / Intimacy – Knowing / Intimacy – A Gift / Intimacy – healing / Intimacy – Cleaving / Intimacy – Love Casts out Fear / Intimacy – Feelings / Intimacy – Attitude